The Best Dating Apps For Women, Tried & Tested By Our Writers
- Best for serious relationships: eharmony
- Best for hookups: Feeld
- Best for introverts: Match
- Best for women dating women: Her
- Best for women dating men: Bumble
- Best for busy professionals: The League
- Best for casual dating: Tinder
- Best for women over 40: Hinge
- Best for single moms: OkCupid
- Best for seniors: OurTime
If you're single (or ever have been), you may have experienced feelings of fatigue, burnout, and frustration. The best dating apps for women help put the fun back in dating—and the power back in your hands.
Psychotherapist Kelly Scott, LMHC, says she spends a lot of time talking to women about how to use dating apps in a way that is fun and even empowering. While dating comes with its struggles, a 2020 study showed that social connectedness, sex, and intimacy are a critical part of our health, well-being, and a positive aging experience1.
The good news? No matter what you're looking for or what your background is, there's a dating app for you.
The benefits of online dating
As a woman dating in New York, I have tried many apps on this list and have come to enjoy the ways they've helped me date with more intention.
Dating apps can offer you a great sense of control, too. "They give you the opportunity to really think about what you're looking for and be more efficient in ruling out factors like age, ethnicity, or sexuality that just don't work for you," says Scott.
Therapist LaTonya Washington, LICSW, adds that dating apps can also be good for people who have dating anxiety. "If you have anxiety around initiating conversations with people in person, apps can allow you to be more vulnerable."
How to choose the best dating app for women
Dating apps allow us women to search for exactly what we're looking for. Whether that's a particular religion, cultural background, age range, or sexual preference, there are apps that target those demographics.
"Getting specific about what you're looking for and what your priorities are will make it more likely that you'll find people you're interested in connecting with," says Scott.
So, while there are of course more generalized dating apps out there that provide an abundance of options, don't discard the more niche options, too. In fact, Scott recommends that you gain experience by playing around with a few different apps.
"Notice the type of person you attract on different apps, and which one you gravitate toward more," she says.
Washington adds that you'll want to think about the kind of relationship you're looking for. "If you're looking for a casual relationship, you may not want to go to places like eHarmony or match.com because those are more often associated with people who are looking for a more serious relationship or marriage," she says.
How we picked:
Reviews
These dating apps have either been tested firsthand or come recommended by experts.
Variety
As Scott reminded us, everyone has different intentions and priorities. The apps on our list were designed for a wide variety of demographics, interests, and relationship goals.
Active user base
Especially critical if you live in a smaller city, it's important to note that the apps below have a notable user base to ensure you have a sufficient number of options.
App experience
We chose apps that are easy to use, to help you avoid dating burnout, frustration, or fatigue.
Our picks for the best dating apps for women of 2023:
Best for introverts: eharmony
Pros:
- Profiles are comprehensive
- Matching process is thorough
- Most users are looking for something serious
Cons:
- Pay to use most features
- Only gender options are “man” and “woman"
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Match scoreVideo chatWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
Serious relationships and marriageEHarmony has its users fill out a super comprehensive questionnaire, weeding out anyone who may be on it to waste time. In fact, it’s one of Washington’s picks for people seeking something more serious.
Since the sign-up process involves 80 questions and can take at least 20 minutes to fill out, you’ll get a lot of information from someone’s profile. After filling out your profile, you’ll receive matches along with a compatibility score, determined by eHarmony’s algorithm.
The app’s great for introverts—you’ll know lots about someone before you even contact them, so you’ll have tons of ideas for questions you can ask before even meeting them. Just note: To get the most out of your experience, you’ll have to pay about $30 to $60 a month.
Read our full eHarmony review here to get a more comprehensive take on the service.
Best for hookups: Feeld
Pros:
- Fosters a sex-positive space
- Option to link your partner with your partners’ profile
- Screenshots aren’t allowed in order to protect privacy
Cons:
- No option to do video calls via the app
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
No screenshots allowedOption to go by pseudonymWhere to browse:
Mobile appBest for:
Kink-specific hookupsFeeld was designed to foster a sex- and kink-positive space for users. The app caters to those looking for threesomes, polyamory, swinging, casual sex, kink, and more.
It’s designed to encourage open and transparent conversations about sexual preferences, in a way that doesn’t feel uncomfortable. Choose from a list of over 15 gender options and 20 sexualities to filter through single people and couples by distance, age range, genders, and more.
You’ll have to pay for a membership if you’re looking for a specific kink, but subscriptions start at just $12 a month. If you’re a more private person, you’ll love that Feeld offers the ability to use a pseudonym—and users aren’t allowed to take screenshots.
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Best for serious relationships: Match.com
Pros:
- Offers live events
- Profiles are really detailed
- You take a quiz that helps match you with other compatible users
Cons:
- Free version doesn’t have many features
- No option for non-monogamous daters
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
QuizLook for people outside your city, one-on-ones with dating experts offeredWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
Serious relationshipsMatch has been in the online dating game for nearly 30 years and has 39 million users. Recommended by Washington as a good pick for someone seeking a serious relationship or marriage, the paid service is one that people tend to take seriously.
The profiles are quite detailed, so be sure to block off a good amount of time to complete yours. You’ll even get to take a quiz that’ll pair you up with the people you’re most compatible with.
If you really want to go above and beyond, you’ll love taking advantage of Match’s live events and optional one-on-one sessions with a dating coach.
Read our in-depth Match review to learn more.
Best for women dating women: Her
Pros:
- Specifically designed for queer people
- Offers live community events
- Screenshots aren’t allowed, to protect privacy
Cons:
- Many features are behind a paywall
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
No screenshots allowedLive eventsPartiesWhere to browse:
Mobile appBest for:
Serious relationshipsDating can be hard no matter who you are—but it comes with a unique set of challenges if you’re queer, trans, or nonbinary. While many dating apps aim to be inclusive for everyone, HER was specifically designed to create a safe and inclusive space for the LGBTQ+ community.
Complete the super simple sign-on process by sharing your pronouns, gender, sexual identity, relationship status, what you’re looking for, and at least one image of yourself. They have a wide enough user base that even reviewers in small towns report having success on the app.
HER specifically caters to professionals, allowing the ability to filter matches by profession and education. People looking for something serious tend to gravitate towards the app. Most features are free, but you’ll have to pay for bonuses such as unlimited swipes.
Bonus: HER sponsors live events and parties for people to make romantic connections and friends.
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Best for women dating men: Bumble
Pros:
- Option to use it to make friends
- Option to get profile verified
- Enables women to take the lead
Cons:
- Matches can time out and expire
- Not everyone likes that women must message first
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Video callingAudio promptsTravel mode to look at other citiesProfile verificationWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
A range of hookups to serious relationshipsFounded for and by women, Bumble is known for its premise that women must message men first. The app enables and empowers women to initiate conversations, so that they can be the ones to set the tone of the chat.
If you’d like to avoid giving out your phone number, you can have audio or video calls right within the app. Plus, there’s the added layer of comfort in that people can choose to have their profiles verified by Bumble administrators, significantly lowering the chances of a catfish situation.
My experience on Bumble: I’m personally looking for a committed partnership, and have met people who are intentional and like-minded on Bumble—yes, even in New York City.
Because I’m the one initiating conversations, I feel a greater sense of control over who I’m picking and choosing by placing myself in the driver’s seat. The men I’ve met on Bumble have largely respected that I have a busy life and demanding career.
Best for busy professionals: The League
Pros:
- Filters out work colleagues
- Meant for ambitious people seeking other ambitious people
- Verifies users through LinkedIn
Cons:
- Limited prospects every day
- Paid options are pricey
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Virtual speed dating eventsWhere to browse:
Mobile appBest for:
Serious relationshipsThey say your career shouldn’t define who you are—but if you are proud and passionate about what you do and you want someone who will respect that while being equally ambitious, you should be using The League.
Marketed towards people who have high standards and are looking for a serious relationship, The League involves an application process in which you submit your profile, which is connected to your LinkedIn account. You’re then put on a waiting list while your profile is reviewed by The League’s administrators.
Once you’re a member, you’ll be presented with a small handful of prospects every day (to limit passive swiping). If you match, you can chat for up to 30 days. That’s the app’s way of encouraging people to meet in real life sooner rather than later.
My experience on The League: I loved the types of prospects I was presented with on The League. It’s really important for me to find a partner who is at least just as ambitious as I am, so I found myself liking a higher percentage of the small amount of prospects I would get daily on this app than I did in my unlimited options on apps like Bumble or Hinge.
Though I didn’t find anything long-term on The League, I met some great, like-minded people who I even stayed friends with through it.
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Best for casual dating: Tinder
Pros:
- Wide user base
- Range of what people are looking for
- Good to use while traveling
Cons:
- You may get repeats of people if you’re in a smaller city
- Some don’t like that height isn’t a required descriptor
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Video chatProfile verificationRewind profilesMessage before matchingWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
Casual dating/hookupsTinder can get a bad reputation—but if you go into it with an open mind, clear intentions of dating casually, or are just looking for a hookup, it’s a great option. There are more than 75 million monthly active users, so it’s also a great pick for people in smaller cities.
It takes less than a few minutes to set up your Tinder profile. All you really need is at least one picture, your name, and your age (though you’ll likely want to put in greater effort with more pictures and a bio to get more engagement).
My experience on Tinder: I had fun going on dates and meeting people, especially because I went in with the intention that I wasn’t looking for anything serious. I had no expectations, making it really fun to just go out and discover new restaurants and bars with different people. I also like that dating casually gave me a better sense of what I am looking for, and what I like. I guess you could say Tinder was like my dating bootcamp.
Best for women over 40 : Hinge
Pros:
- Lots of users looking for serious relationships
- Queer-friendly
- Travel feature is good for frequent travelers
Cons:
- Paid subscription is pricey
- Best matches hidden behind paywall
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Video chatAudio promptsProfile verificationWhere to browse:
Mobile appBest for:
A range, but more serious relationshipsMarketed towards people looking for more meaningful and serious relationships, Hinge aims to match you with others based on your interests, hobbies, or career.
With a free membership, you can message and swipe on people’s profiles, where you’ll see their sexuality, gender, job, education, religious beliefs, dating intentions, and political leanings. If desired, you can opt for a premium subscription to get even more specific about what you’re looking for.
My experience on Hinge: I found Hinge to be the most engaging dating app. I appreciate that audio prompts allow me to listen to a person’s voice—you can learn a lot about someone from their voice!
I like that Hinge really facilitates deeper conversation. My favorite part, though, is the ability to adjust your location. I travel a lot, so a couple of weeks ahead of going to a new city or country, I would set that place as my location to plan dates abroad.
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Best for single moms: OkCupid
Pros:
- LGBTQ+ friendly
- Options for non-monogamous people
- Quiz helps match you appropriately
Cons:
- Quiz takes time to complete
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
Video chatProfile verificationIncognito modeRead receiptsWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
Range of casual hookups to serious relationshipsOne of the OG dating sites you heard about way before apps even existed, OKCupid has changed a lot over the years. The once old school site is now one of the more fun and inclusive apps out there.
Answer a (fairly long) questionnaire, and OkCupid’s algorithm will pair you with the best match it can find. In fact, the app will even provide a compatibility score along with each match.
Those with busy schedules, such as single moms or working professionals, love that OkCupid offers a large range of filters, the ability to get really specific about what you’re looking for, and that the compatibility score will tell you who you should prioritize meeting up with based upon the app’s ultra smart algorithm.
Best for seniors: OurTime
Pros:
- Opportunity for in-person events
- Specifically made for people over 50
- Platform is user-friendly
Cons:
- Paid subscription required to message people
Compatibility:
iOS and AndroidUnique Features:
In-person eventsWhere to browse:
Mobile appDesktop siteBest for:
Serious relationshipsCreated for people over 50, OurTime boasts a user-friendly interface with the goal of making it easy to set up your profile and browse through potential matches.
To message other users, you’ll need a paid subscription, which starts at just $12 per month.
OurTime hosts in-person events, so you can expect mixers, cooking classes, and other opportunities to meet people in real life.
Since the app is paid, it tends to attract a more mature audience of people seeking serious relationships.
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Tips for online dating
Washington recommends thinking about your nonnegotiables first. "Sometimes, people talk themselves out of their nonnegotiables and say they can compromise on more than they'd really like to," she says.
Ask yourself whether you can live with a person's traits long term, six, or even 60 years into the future, Washington suggests. Consider the factors that are most important to you, be it age, political affiliation, interests, religious practices, or the city you'd like to settle down in.
Once you do start putting yourself out there, Scott says to pay close attention to the type of profile you're building.
"Think about what you are communicating about yourself," she says. "What are you looking for, and what kind of conversations do you want to be having with people on the apps? Ensure your profile facilitates the kind of conversation or tone of relationship that you're looking for."
How dating impacts longevity
"We learn about ourselves, the world, and what it means to be human by our relationships with each other," says Washington.
Washington emphasizes that we, as humans, depend on relationships, emotional connection, and intimacy. "The quality of our relationships has an impact on us and our broader well-being," she adds.
FAQ:
Which dating app do women use most?
Tinder has the most users by far—regardless of gender. For that reason, it's a great app for people who live in smaller cities or simply want the most options.
Is Bumble a hookup app?
No, Bumble is not a hookup app. While there are definitely people on Bumble who are looking for just that, it caters to those who are looking for something serious.
What dating app is endorsed by girls?
Many apps are loved by women, but Bumble seems to be the one that tries the hardest to put women first. It is meant to foster a safer, more empowering space for women to date.
On what dating app do women message first?
Bumble is the app that asks straight women to initiate a chat with their matches.
Should a girl message a guy first on a dating app?
Scott emphasizes that who messages first is up to you. "People have different preferences," she says. "Some prefer to be approached, and others prefer to do the approaching."
The takeaway
The best dating apps for women make the world of online dating feel a little less overwhelming, especially if you're clear on your intentions. Looking to settle down? Be sure to check out our curated list of the best dating apps for serious relationships here.